By day, my hubby and I are children's books illustrators, authors, publishers....you get the idea.  But we've picked up an interesting night hobby.

 

No, not that hobby.....well, yes, I mean we DO that hobby, and generally at night.  And damn, it's good, but I digress.

 

We are paranormal investigators.  We've been on a few investigations, written a couple of books, started a podcast, blah blah blah.  We are not experts, but then again, no one really is in this field.

 

Last night, "Paranormal State" aired on A&E.  There was a lot of hype and build up, which had me a bit concerned, but hey.  I, for one, will watch almost anything paranormally related.  Whether I'm rolling my eyes and throwing foam bricks at the TV or saying, "Holy crap, they got sumpin!" it makes no difference to me.

Yes, I'm a ghost slut.

 

So hubby and I settled in last night to watch "Paranormal State."  Like moths to the bug zapper, we were drawn to it. 

 

What the biggest bunch of bullshit, pastey-butt, fag-assed (not that there's anything wrong with that) stupidity.  There's 60 minutes of my life I'll never get back again. 

 

"It's a deeeemoooonnnnn.  Oooooooooo!!!"  [cue spooky music]

 

"Don't make me call in the Warrens!"  [cue Lorraine Warren]

 

"Don't say the demon's name!!"  [Aamon Abaddon Abalam Agares Aim Alastor Alloces Amaymon Amdusias Amon Amy (you didn't know her like I did) Andrealphus Andromalius Antichrist Apollyon Armaros Asmodai Astaroth!!!!!!!]

 

And that's just the A's.  Don't make me go through the whole alphabet. (The "secret" name, by the way, was, "Belial.")  Oh wait, I almost forgot to cue the Catholic priest.  No worries...he's been sitting out in the van for the past 3 hours, ready to go.

 

And what the hell were the girls on this show doing??  If they are meant to be eye candy, then the producers need to fire their wardrobe director.  They looked bored most of the time, and obviously were directed to not speak, even when spoken to.  Hell, they didn't even bother to nod in appreciation when the STAR of the show (what's-his-fag) would tell them something, all serious-like.  The only time I heard them speak is when they got sent back to their room, like little children at the grown-up's party.  

 

"I guess the investigation is getting kind of out of hand."  [giggle giggle giggle]

 

Puhleeze.  At least put them in some cute jammies and let them pillow fight.  It would have been WAY more enjoyable for the audience, and hubby and I would have been all cranked up and not too tired for some nice hanky-panky.

 

And....AND...don't even get me started on the people they were investigating.  I imagine there is some truth to the people's claims, and I have no real complaints on how they handled the child, but by goddess, it appears to me that they were exploiting that woman and her situation for their own financial gain.  At first I wasn't sure if she was in on the whole "it's a deeeeemmmoooonnn!!!" scam, but when I saw her crying over her son's loss in a father figure, and how sincere she was, I could only conclude that they were more interested in the Big Buck than they were actually helping this poor woman.

 

Okay, fine.  Try not to look like T.A.P.S.  I get it.  But don't do this to people.  Don't tell them that a demon is following them or you or Druid Duck around.  And don't hold fake EVP sessions that look like seances (or was that a seance masked as an EVP session?  Yes.  That was it.  They didn't get a single EVP did they?)

 

So I stand by my ranting paragraph.  This was a horrible paranormal show that will do absolutely nothing to further the serious investigators' field.  It was over-scripted, overly-dramatic and pretty much just over-the-top.  Hopefully it will just be "over" .... and soon.

 

Now, where's that foam brick?